Apologies for my absence yesterday... Dealing with the mountain of paperwork I have been putting off was seriously stressing me out- it's not completely over with, but like Gretchen Rubin, the author of The Happiness Project, says 'best is good, better is best.'
So today I'm asking myself the third question in a series of introductory questions Gretchen designed to help formulate Happiness Project Resolutions- the foundation for the project. I've answered question one here, and two, here.
Question 3: Is there any way in which you don't feel right about your life? Do you wish you could change your job, city, family situation, or other circumstances? Are you living up to your expectations for yourself? Does your life reflect your values? (Scuse me Gretchen, that's actually 4 questions!)
Ok, let's tackle these one at a time!
- I'm struggling to identify the feeling of not "feeling right about my life." My feelings about the "rightness" of my current incarnation as a law student are somewhere between the feeling I had as an education student/ primary school teacher (pretty fish-out-of-water) and as a Kinesiology student studying anatomy and health psychology (pretty darn amazing!!) This gives rise to the obvious question- why didn't I pursue Kinesiology? I don't know... I guess it's one of those "knowledge" degrees that didn't actually lead to something specific and I was too impatient/ unimaganitive to find ways to creatively use my degree.
- Do I wish I could change my job/ city/ family situation etc? Ummm, this is a tricky one. My current part time job (paralegal) is good experience for being a lawyer. Sydney is an amazing city. My partner is the love of my life. However; there are probably jobs out there more suitable for my personality and strengths. I miss my hometown, Toronto, Canada, and all my wonderful friends there. I'd love to be closer to my family but for us to move back to Canada would mean that Nick has to leave his gorgeous family which would be so difficult for both of us to do.
- Everyone goes on about success but there is a great problem with success: sometimes it sets the bar so high that it's impossible to actually live up to your expectations. I know, I know, shoot for the stars blah blah blah, but sometimes I feel like my expectations far outstrip what I'm realistically capable of. Is it possible that the anxiety resulting from constant struggle and failure is worse than what would come from slightly lowering my expectations?
- Does my life reflect my values? Yes and no... I value education, self-improvement, and challenge. I also value my sanity. Hmmn.